Most times we find ourselves trying to live up to the expectation of one person or the other. It could be our father, mother, brother, sister, spouse, mentor or even a celebrity. It is often because we look up to that person a lot. We are happy when they approve of a decision we make or when we believe if we were to meet that person on the road, he/she will give us a nod of approval; that’s in the case of looking up to a person we idolize. The approval of a decision could be in any form; for a father, it could be studying the course he wants you to at college level. For a mother, it could be marrying the dream man/woman she has often described to her child. For your brother or sister, it could be living your life the way they live theirs, believing you should follow their footsteps. For your spouse, it could be trying to be the perfect partner for them. For a celebrity we idolize, it could be dressing the way they do or living our life the way they live theirs. The list is endless.
The question I am asking here is this, is it healthy to try and live up to someone’s expectation regardless of who that person is? What do I stand to gain if I keep trying to be the perfect person for everyone? Family, friends, society, colleagues, etc. Am I living a happy and fulfilled life? How can I truly be happy and successful when am trying to please, respect and be polite to everyone I come across? I think we should talk about what it means to be happy and successful; that would be another topic. For now let’s focus on trying to live up to other people’s expectation.
By the time we realize we have been living our life based on what is expected of us from the society, family and friends, it is usually too late as the years would have passed us by, you might even have grey hairs already. But it is never too late to realize yourself and start living for you. Yes you may be married and have children or you may be a grandmother by now, you have a job or business to run, you may be the breadwinner for the family, internal and external, you most likely have too many responsibilities to cater to. You probably even have high blood pressure already from wanting to meet up to all your responsibilities.
If you find yourself doing this, I want you to take a sit, relax and ask yourself this, what if I die tonight? Life will go on my brother and sister. You as a person isn’t thinking about what you really want from this life that has been given to you and you alone on a platter of gold. You have done well for yourself in a cruel world. Take a moment to appreciate you and where you are. Learn to work and live in a relaxed manner. Don’t get stressed up. Don’t be worried about any matter, after-all every problem has an expiry date and if it doesn’t the more reason not to worry but live each moment a happy person. There are 24 hours in a day and what you do with that time is entirely up to you. Every individual has his/her own dreams, vision, goals, mission in life. And it is true you can only go as far as your imaginations take you. So would you spend your 24hours trying to live up to the world’s expectation or would you rather spend it living up to your own expectations.
Change the way you think today and start living for you…if there is a part in your imaginative mind where you are dunking basketball like a star, what are you waiting for? A miracle? You want to wake up one morning and become like Dwyane Wade. Snap out of it, it isn’t going to happen. Do yourself a favour, buy a ball and start practicing even if you can only afford 15mins out of your 24hours per day to practicalize your dream. Never give up, you never know who is watching or when you might need to put the skills you are trying to perfect to good use or a good cause. To give up is to live to people’s expectation, to never give up is living for yourself. You are UNIQUE. No one can be YOU. That’s a certain fact. So what would you do with YOU?